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December 13, 2024
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The hidden costs of masking in Autistic women and girls

Autistic women and girls are masking to such a degree that they risk late or missed diagnosis. Masking may help socially and professionally in the short term, but may also harm mental health and a person’s sense of self-worth in the process.

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Autistic women and girls often face immense pressure to mask, to hide or alter their natural traits, in order to navigate a world that wasn’t designed for them. Masking might help them avoid judgment, bullying, or misunderstanding in the short term, but it comes with significant long-term costs to mental health and identity.

Masking doesn’t look the same for everyone. It’s shaped not only by individual traits but also by other layers of identity like race, culture, gender, and class, which influence how masking is experienced and perceived. Recognizing this nuance is crucial as we work to create environments that support all kinds of minds.

What is masking?

Masking, sometimes called camouflaging, involves suppressing Autistic traits or mimicking neurotypical behaviors to conform to societal expectations. Examples include forcing oneself to make eye contact, rehearsing conversations in advance, or holding back stimming behaviors like tapping or rocking.

For many Autistic women and girls, masking isn’t just about fitting in, it’s about survival. It’s a tool for avoiding harm, whether that’s bullying on the playground, microaggressions in the workplace, or misunderstandings in relationships. But masking takes a toll. The constant effort to monitor, suppress, and perform can leave people feeling drained, disconnected from themselves, and, in many cases, unseen by others.

Why do Autistic women and girls mask more often?

For decades, Autism research and diagnostic tools have focused on boys and men (you can read more about masking in boys and men here), leading to a narrower understanding of how Autism presents in women and girls. Many Autistic girls are missed because they don’t fit the stereotypical image of Autism, one that often overlooks subtler traits or adaptations.

For instance, an Autistic girl might mimic her peers’ social behaviors to avoid standing out or force a smile to appear approachable even when overwhelmed. These adaptations can help her seem “typical,” but they also make her struggles invisible to teachers, parents, and even healthcare providers.

Cultural expectations further amplify the need to mask. Girls are often expected to be nurturing, socially adept, and polite, leaving little room for behaviors that fall outside these norms. For women of color or those from marginalized communities, these expectations are compounded by additional pressures to counter stereotypes or avoid scrutiny. The result is that masking doesn’t just happen, it’s often demanded.

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The toll of masking

Masking can help Autistic women and girls navigate neurotypical spaces, but it comes at a cost. The mental and emotional effort it takes to constantly self-monitor and suppress natural behaviors can lead to:

Burnout

The ongoing energy drain from masking can result in exhaustion that impacts every part of life.

Mental health challenges

Studies show that masking is linked to higher rates of anxiety, depression, and even suicidal ideation.

Loss of identity

Constantly suppressing traits to meet external expectations can make it harder for people to understand or express their true selves.

These impacts aren’t evenly distributed. For example, Autistic women from underrepresented racial or cultural backgrounds may face additional challenges when masking, such as navigating both ableism and racism. Similarly, individuals with fewer resources may not have access to supportive environments or diagnosis, which can make masking feel like the only option for survival.

Moving toward unmasking and authenticity

Masking isn’t a long-term solution, and it shouldn’t be necessary for anyone to feel safe or included. Instead of expecting Autistic women and girls to adapt, the focus needs to shift to creating environments where they can thrive as their authentic selves.

Here’s how we can start making that shift:

Rethink norms

Stop holding neurotypical behaviors as the benchmark for success or acceptance. Instead, celebrate the diverse ways people communicate, connect, and contribute.

Recognize diversity within Autism

Diagnostic tools and educational approaches need to account for how Autism shows up differently across genders, races, and cultures.

Build inclusive environments

Whether it’s in classrooms, workplaces, or social spaces, prioritize design that accommodates sensory needs, clear communication, and flexibility.

Listen to lived experiences

Autistic women and girls, especially those from marginalized backgrounds, must be at the center of conversations about solutions.

Research also has a role to play. Most studies on masking have focused on cisgender white women, leaving significant gaps in understanding how other intersecting identities influence the experience. By broadening this lens, we can create tools and strategies that better support everyone.

Final thoughts

Masking often feels like a necessary survival strategy for Autistic women and girls in a world that doesn’t always see or understand them. But it shouldn’t have to be. The cost to mental health, identity, and well-being is far too high.

To build a better, more inclusive world, we need to stop asking Autistic people to change who they are and start challenging the systems that exclude them. The richness of neurodiversity lies in its authenticity and when we create spaces where people feel safe to unmask, we all benefit.

Über die Autor*in

Beaux Miebach

Beaux ist Tiimos Lead für Inklusion und Zugehörigkeit, eine queere, neurodivergente Strateg*in, die inklusive Systeme gestaltet, bei denen Zugänglichkeit und Intersektionalität im Mittelpunkt stehen.

Mehr erfahren
December 13, 2024
• Updated:

The hidden costs of masking in Autistic women and girls

Autistic women and girls are masking to such a degree that they risk late or missed diagnosis. Masking may help socially and professionally in the short term, but may also harm mental health and a person’s sense of self-worth in the process.

No items found.

Autistic women and girls often face immense pressure to mask, to hide or alter their natural traits, in order to navigate a world that wasn’t designed for them. Masking might help them avoid judgment, bullying, or misunderstanding in the short term, but it comes with significant long-term costs to mental health and identity.

Masking doesn’t look the same for everyone. It’s shaped not only by individual traits but also by other layers of identity like race, culture, gender, and class, which influence how masking is experienced and perceived. Recognizing this nuance is crucial as we work to create environments that support all kinds of minds.

What is masking?

Masking, sometimes called camouflaging, involves suppressing Autistic traits or mimicking neurotypical behaviors to conform to societal expectations. Examples include forcing oneself to make eye contact, rehearsing conversations in advance, or holding back stimming behaviors like tapping or rocking.

For many Autistic women and girls, masking isn’t just about fitting in, it’s about survival. It’s a tool for avoiding harm, whether that’s bullying on the playground, microaggressions in the workplace, or misunderstandings in relationships. But masking takes a toll. The constant effort to monitor, suppress, and perform can leave people feeling drained, disconnected from themselves, and, in many cases, unseen by others.

Why do Autistic women and girls mask more often?

For decades, Autism research and diagnostic tools have focused on boys and men (you can read more about masking in boys and men here), leading to a narrower understanding of how Autism presents in women and girls. Many Autistic girls are missed because they don’t fit the stereotypical image of Autism, one that often overlooks subtler traits or adaptations.

For instance, an Autistic girl might mimic her peers’ social behaviors to avoid standing out or force a smile to appear approachable even when overwhelmed. These adaptations can help her seem “typical,” but they also make her struggles invisible to teachers, parents, and even healthcare providers.

Cultural expectations further amplify the need to mask. Girls are often expected to be nurturing, socially adept, and polite, leaving little room for behaviors that fall outside these norms. For women of color or those from marginalized communities, these expectations are compounded by additional pressures to counter stereotypes or avoid scrutiny. The result is that masking doesn’t just happen, it’s often demanded.

Planung, die sich dir anpasst

Tiimo gibt dir Klarheit und Struktur, ohne starr zu sein. Plane auf deine Weise mit visuellen Zeitplänen und Routinen, die mit dir mitgehen.

Apple logo
Tiimo im App Store holen
Google logo
Tiimo bei Google Play holen

The toll of masking

Masking can help Autistic women and girls navigate neurotypical spaces, but it comes at a cost. The mental and emotional effort it takes to constantly self-monitor and suppress natural behaviors can lead to:

Burnout

The ongoing energy drain from masking can result in exhaustion that impacts every part of life.

Mental health challenges

Studies show that masking is linked to higher rates of anxiety, depression, and even suicidal ideation.

Loss of identity

Constantly suppressing traits to meet external expectations can make it harder for people to understand or express their true selves.

These impacts aren’t evenly distributed. For example, Autistic women from underrepresented racial or cultural backgrounds may face additional challenges when masking, such as navigating both ableism and racism. Similarly, individuals with fewer resources may not have access to supportive environments or diagnosis, which can make masking feel like the only option for survival.

Moving toward unmasking and authenticity

Masking isn’t a long-term solution, and it shouldn’t be necessary for anyone to feel safe or included. Instead of expecting Autistic women and girls to adapt, the focus needs to shift to creating environments where they can thrive as their authentic selves.

Here’s how we can start making that shift:

Rethink norms

Stop holding neurotypical behaviors as the benchmark for success or acceptance. Instead, celebrate the diverse ways people communicate, connect, and contribute.

Recognize diversity within Autism

Diagnostic tools and educational approaches need to account for how Autism shows up differently across genders, races, and cultures.

Build inclusive environments

Whether it’s in classrooms, workplaces, or social spaces, prioritize design that accommodates sensory needs, clear communication, and flexibility.

Listen to lived experiences

Autistic women and girls, especially those from marginalized backgrounds, must be at the center of conversations about solutions.

Research also has a role to play. Most studies on masking have focused on cisgender white women, leaving significant gaps in understanding how other intersecting identities influence the experience. By broadening this lens, we can create tools and strategies that better support everyone.

Final thoughts

Masking often feels like a necessary survival strategy for Autistic women and girls in a world that doesn’t always see or understand them. But it shouldn’t have to be. The cost to mental health, identity, and well-being is far too high.

To build a better, more inclusive world, we need to stop asking Autistic people to change who they are and start challenging the systems that exclude them. The richness of neurodiversity lies in its authenticity and when we create spaces where people feel safe to unmask, we all benefit.

About the author

Beaux Miebach

Beaux ist Tiimos Lead für Inklusion und Zugehörigkeit, eine queere, neurodivergente Strateg*in, die inklusive Systeme gestaltet, bei denen Zugänglichkeit und Intersektionalität im Mittelpunkt stehen.

More from the author
The hidden costs of masking in Autistic women and girls
December 13, 2024

The hidden costs of masking in Autistic women and girls

Autistic women and girls are masking to such a degree that they risk late or missed diagnosis. Masking may help socially and professionally in the short term, but may also harm mental health and a person’s sense of self-worth in the process.

Tiimo coach of the month icon

Georgina Shute

Gina is an ADHD coach and founder of KindTwo, helping overwhelmed leaders reclaim time and build neuroinclusive systems that actually work.

No items found.

Autistic women and girls often face immense pressure to mask, to hide or alter their natural traits, in order to navigate a world that wasn’t designed for them. Masking might help them avoid judgment, bullying, or misunderstanding in the short term, but it comes with significant long-term costs to mental health and identity.

Masking doesn’t look the same for everyone. It’s shaped not only by individual traits but also by other layers of identity like race, culture, gender, and class, which influence how masking is experienced and perceived. Recognizing this nuance is crucial as we work to create environments that support all kinds of minds.

What is masking?

Masking, sometimes called camouflaging, involves suppressing Autistic traits or mimicking neurotypical behaviors to conform to societal expectations. Examples include forcing oneself to make eye contact, rehearsing conversations in advance, or holding back stimming behaviors like tapping or rocking.

For many Autistic women and girls, masking isn’t just about fitting in, it’s about survival. It’s a tool for avoiding harm, whether that’s bullying on the playground, microaggressions in the workplace, or misunderstandings in relationships. But masking takes a toll. The constant effort to monitor, suppress, and perform can leave people feeling drained, disconnected from themselves, and, in many cases, unseen by others.

Why do Autistic women and girls mask more often?

For decades, Autism research and diagnostic tools have focused on boys and men (you can read more about masking in boys and men here), leading to a narrower understanding of how Autism presents in women and girls. Many Autistic girls are missed because they don’t fit the stereotypical image of Autism, one that often overlooks subtler traits or adaptations.

For instance, an Autistic girl might mimic her peers’ social behaviors to avoid standing out or force a smile to appear approachable even when overwhelmed. These adaptations can help her seem “typical,” but they also make her struggles invisible to teachers, parents, and even healthcare providers.

Cultural expectations further amplify the need to mask. Girls are often expected to be nurturing, socially adept, and polite, leaving little room for behaviors that fall outside these norms. For women of color or those from marginalized communities, these expectations are compounded by additional pressures to counter stereotypes or avoid scrutiny. The result is that masking doesn’t just happen, it’s often demanded.

The toll of masking

Masking can help Autistic women and girls navigate neurotypical spaces, but it comes at a cost. The mental and emotional effort it takes to constantly self-monitor and suppress natural behaviors can lead to:

Burnout

The ongoing energy drain from masking can result in exhaustion that impacts every part of life.

Mental health challenges

Studies show that masking is linked to higher rates of anxiety, depression, and even suicidal ideation.

Loss of identity

Constantly suppressing traits to meet external expectations can make it harder for people to understand or express their true selves.

These impacts aren’t evenly distributed. For example, Autistic women from underrepresented racial or cultural backgrounds may face additional challenges when masking, such as navigating both ableism and racism. Similarly, individuals with fewer resources may not have access to supportive environments or diagnosis, which can make masking feel like the only option for survival.

Moving toward unmasking and authenticity

Masking isn’t a long-term solution, and it shouldn’t be necessary for anyone to feel safe or included. Instead of expecting Autistic women and girls to adapt, the focus needs to shift to creating environments where they can thrive as their authentic selves.

Here’s how we can start making that shift:

Rethink norms

Stop holding neurotypical behaviors as the benchmark for success or acceptance. Instead, celebrate the diverse ways people communicate, connect, and contribute.

Recognize diversity within Autism

Diagnostic tools and educational approaches need to account for how Autism shows up differently across genders, races, and cultures.

Build inclusive environments

Whether it’s in classrooms, workplaces, or social spaces, prioritize design that accommodates sensory needs, clear communication, and flexibility.

Listen to lived experiences

Autistic women and girls, especially those from marginalized backgrounds, must be at the center of conversations about solutions.

Research also has a role to play. Most studies on masking have focused on cisgender white women, leaving significant gaps in understanding how other intersecting identities influence the experience. By broadening this lens, we can create tools and strategies that better support everyone.

Final thoughts

Masking often feels like a necessary survival strategy for Autistic women and girls in a world that doesn’t always see or understand them. But it shouldn’t have to be. The cost to mental health, identity, and well-being is far too high.

To build a better, more inclusive world, we need to stop asking Autistic people to change who they are and start challenging the systems that exclude them. The richness of neurodiversity lies in its authenticity and when we create spaces where people feel safe to unmask, we all benefit.

Illustration of two hands coming together to form a heart shape.

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